Call Sheet: Miss America Gets Real

We here at The Operator love us some reality television. The trashier the better. And we have the scoop on a show that could be all kinds of trash. It seems that the organizers of the Miss America Pageant have seen sinking ratings in their broadcasts and lagging interest in their pageant all together. So they are doing what anyone in Hollywood who is on their way out seems to be doing- they are creating their own reality show.

Yes, you heard it kids, Miss America will now be a seven part reality series leading up to the Pageant where the new Miss America will be crowned. During the series, contestants will go through a number of competitions and then they will be whittled down from 50 to 15. 8 of those fifteen will be chosen by judges and the other seven will be voted upon by America itself.

In an effort to make this new reality series a hit, The Operator has come up with a few competitions that we would like to see the ladies compete in.

• All reality shows have some sort eating contest and this one should be no different. The twist being that the contest is who will eat. Anything. At all. First one to indulge gets booted.
• The weight Flush- who can lose the most weight in a 24hr period.
• Who can walk and talk at the same time?
• The Smile-a-thon: First girl to drop the smile loses.
• The Gauntlet: Contestants get drunk and are released into a nightclub, where they have to negotiate horny frat boys, bathroom lines, and bad music. The winner must leave without getting date raped.

The Operator has also come up with a few questions for the Q & A segment:

• How would you solve the immigration crises?
• Which other contestant did you hate the most and why?
• If you could assassinate any world leader who would it be and why?
• Please devise an appropriate and reasonable exit strategy for our forces in Iraq.

photo via [Bongo News]