411: Photo Oops!

House Speaker Dennis "Fatty McFatfuck" Hastert got busted after he abandoned his Hydrogen-fueled car for the comfort of his gas-guzzling SUV following a staged photo op at a Washington gas station. Hastert then reportedly coated himself in crude oil and ordered his driver to "run over a few blind children" as he made his way back to his office.

[Yahoo! News via The Randi Rhodes Show]